Sims Shenanigans: If You Think My Sims 3 Games are Weird, Let Me Tell You about The Sims 1


You all know I love talking about the ridiculous things that happen in my Sims games, but, some time ago, I decided to try playing the original The Sims game again. It was the first version of the game I ever played, back in elementary school. I figured it’d be fun for like half an hour, just for the nostalgia.

Imagine my surprise when I kept playing and playing and wanting to go back to it! Obviously the graphics are horrible, and the diversity and customization are not great, but it’s legitimately a fun and difficult game!

Also, The Sims 1 is wild.

And that’s why I’m here to tell you about the drama and chaos that is the Sims 1 game I’ve been playing. I hope you’ll find it as entertaining as I did!

This is Suzie.

thin woman with medium length brown hair, looking at a clone of herself with magical sparkles all around them

She does magic.

This is Suzie’s girlfriend, Jade.

Suzie kissing a thin blonde woman wearing a light colored gown

They met because of their mutual interest in magic.

And this is Suzie’s boyfriend, Mark.

Suzie cuddling naked in a hot tub with a thin but muscular man with short brown hair

And here’s where it starts getting interesting.

My goal in this game was to grow a magic beanstalk tall enough to climb, and they only appear on your home lot if you do enough magic. But doing magic is a lot of work. You need skills and ingredients. You need to go to public lots to do performances and do tasks and barter and buy things. You can make some things at home, but that requires time. And then you need to be in a good mood when you do the magic, or else it will go horribly wrong. And all this is on top of making money and surviving!

Suzie needed someone to make money and ingredients, to help with all the housework and gardening (Sims actually have to water their flowers in this game! It’s terrible!), and to use magic on. She didn’t want to do that to her girlfriend…

So she magicked Mark to fall in love with her.

Suzie casting a spell on Mark, he is standing there with magical sparkles forming a heart around him

Ever since then, Suzie has been slinging magic like nobody’s business, and my game has been chaos.

My game is filled with raccoons and skunks and a bear that tries to steal my honey and roaches and like 5 stray cats and dogs that never leave and ominous phone calls and dirty dishes and lawn-flamingos-turned-showgirls and food they can’t even eat before it all goes bad and constant fires and a fridge that opens and closes on its own and like 20 snakes and angry gnomes attacking my sims and one gnome that does nothing but get drunk in the wine-making vat and stumble around. At one point, Suzie was a ghost, and Mark was a toad.

picture of the user interface, instead of showing their usual faces, one picture is just a toad, the other is a glowy blue face

three gnomes stomping into Suzie's house

a bunch of snakes in Suzie's yard

an attractive woman with pink skin wearing a pink showgirl outfit that resembles flamingo feathers, doing a high kick

Suzie and Mark chatting, but both their heads are just donkey heads

Suzie stomping grapes in a vat in her bikini, Mark standing there watching her, an animal catcher guy also standing there, and a living gnome randomly standing nearby

Mark walking past Suzie on the couch while Suzie looks like a humanoid wolf in a dress

Poor Mark just looks like he is so done with this shit, and none of it even fazes him anymore.

There’s been a bit of relationship drama. Mark once caught Suzie and Jade hugging, so he slapped Jade, and then he and Suzie got into a throwdown.

The real drama, however, is that…

Wait for it…

Suzie has actually fallen in love with Mark.


My sim has done gone and got herself into a bonafide love triangle. But a really messed up one since she’s cheating on her real girlfriend with her fake boyfriend and her fake boyfriend with her real girlfriend, not to mention the fact that the man she’s in love with is only in love with her because of a spell. The spell somewhat wore off and he then fell back in love on his own, but still, it started with a spell, so is it real, or is it just leftover feelings from the magic?

The plot thickened even more when I looked at their personalities and interests. It turns out Mark is kind of a jerk. Suzie, on the other hand, is just kind of an average person. She’s not inherently mean, and one of the things she likes most in life is romance. (I mean, I created them, so I should’ve already known this, but I genuinely forgot, especially since I didn’t originally create Mark for the purpose of being Suzie’s captive.)

So this begs the question: What motivation could’ve made someone who wasn’t inherently bad do something so horrible to someone else? I also kinda feel bad for her. She wants romance more than anything, but she’s backed herself into a corner and will probably lose both of her loves.


Oh well! At least she has pet dragons!

(I didn’t get any photos of the dragons, so please enjoy this random YouTube video I found!)

Check out the Sims Shenanigans category for more posts like this!


Talk to me!

Have you ever played the original The Sims?
If you have, what was your favorite expansion?
(Mine was Superstar! Though I still remember the excitement of being able to send sims to community lots for the first time and then away overnight on vacation.)


Your Thoughts


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  1. Greg

    Yay a SIMS post! And honestly? Some of these older games just have something that later ones don’t. I’ve had this happen a few times. This is crazy though! lawn-flamingoes-turned showgirls wha 43tgkj rofn;oif??? Drunk gnomes?? This sounds totally batshit. I love it! I had no idea you could do half this stuff!

    I’m rooting for Jade myself. πŸ™‚

    1. Kristen Burns

      Yeah, some older games were genuinely great and still hold up! This game was so wild lol.

      Jade just wears that ghostly Victorian(?) gown everywhere, it’s a real look. Suzie just couldn’t resist πŸ˜›

  2. Jessica

    I had a Sims game but really wasn’t into it. I couldn’t make her do anything I wanted her to do. Then Facebook had a Sims game, but she got depressed because she couldn’t find work and Chris (my actual boyfriend’s name) left her. I did talk Chris (my actual boyfriend) to play the facebook game, but I don’t know if he really played it. Then facebook got rid of the game. I do enjoy reading about other people’s Sims game experiences.

  3. Roberta R.

    “(Sims actually have to water their flowers in this game! It’s terrible!)”
    πŸ˜‚ More than all the other things they’re going through? πŸ˜†

    I love the flamingo-turned-showgirl haha.

    So…you have roaches in your game too? Not enough of them at home? πŸ˜‚ πŸ˜‰ I hope they’re not giant roaches though…And thanks for not posting a pic of them…I would have unsubscribed!!! πŸ˜– πŸ˜‚

    1. Kristen Burns

      Re: watering plants – Yes! More than all the other things! Because it’s so time-consuming, and I always forget, and then the plants are dead and you have to buy more, and you don’t even really have a choice! Sims aren’t happy if their yard isn’t decorated! Gah! I’m so glad they did away with that in other versions lol.

      I love the showgirl. She’s such a sweetheart too.

      Ugh, the damn roaches. The sims always stand right in the middle of them to spray them. No pictures of roaches on this blog. I would never do my followers dirty like that πŸ˜‚

  4. Mary Kirkland

    I’ve never played Sims but I watched a lady do the 100 baby challenge in Sims on Youtube back when it was all the craze. So I have some idea how the game is played and how ridiculous things can happen. One of the mother characters in the sims game had her ex die and he came back as a ghost that would break the faucet in the bathroom. It was hilarious.